I Sit Here

I sat here earlier about to cry.

I sit here now after leaving the room, trying not to cry, and failing.

I sit here disappointed in myself.

I sit here sad and hurting.

I sit here with so much on my mind, so much weighing on my heart.

I sit here longing for healing and reconciliation.

I sit here knowing I have messed up.

I sit here knowing that I love God.

I sit here, confident that I will always love God, yet knowing that things are strange between us now.

I sit here trusting Him.

I sit here waiting on Him.

I sit here loving Him.

I sit here missing Him, while knowing He never left.

I sit here empty.

I sit here weak and tired.

I sit here alone.

I sit here hurting.

I sit here about to cry all over again.