I got on here an hour ago and am just now typing these words. I’ve been scrolling through two blogs for an hour, catching up on so much life that I’ve missed.

How has it been so long?

Before college I diligently read many blogs every single day. I felt like I had friends all over the world as I read the stories and lived a tiny piece of life alongside them.

Obviously, so much changed when college began and in order to keep up good grades, get plugged in at school, and begin new friendships, something had to go. I never thought it would, though.

Blogging organically stopped for me. First I stopped posting as much but still checked blogs each day, then it all just slowly faded.

I miss it, but I’m thankful for the in-real-life relationships that have come because of this ‘extra’ time in each day. Still, there are some nights I fall into bed wondering how it feels like I’m taking a a breath for the first time…some days are busy and long, and I don’t know how I could fit blogging back in there.

But truthfully? Honest, here’s-what-it’s-really-about?

1. All’s been said out in this great big place

I’m not sure what thoughts I could offer that someone hasn’t already shared. I don’t know what I have of value that’s left to share. Sometimes it feels like anything that could be written has already been spoken, typed out, shared.

2. This place feels like an old piece of me

The majority of this blog is from high school, when my heart was broken and healed, when I began to be sick and when I had surgery…these posts go along with my breaking and healing and finding Him Faithful.

These pages, these words, they’re part of my Story. But it feels like they’re a couple chapters back; so many pages have been turned.

I know I have changed and my Story has continued, I’m just not sure how to share that voice.

I want to get back here. I don’t know how to balance it, and that might be a learning curve I’m not even ready for yet…but in the hour of looking through blogs, I’ve realized one old blog friend adopted a baby last month, and another published a book and had a little boy.

Can I really have been gone from this beautiful blogging world that long?

There are no promises attached to this. {Truthfully, I don’t think anyone reads here anymore.} All I can say is that I’m thinking…I may not be here writing, but I’m thinking and trying to find a balance between writing and being there for the people that need me in-real-life (and letting them be there for me too), and being present with them.