God keeps doing this thing in my life.
It sounds and looks like this:
Hey Kait, I love you so much. Really. More than you know. Here is everything you’ll need for today, a gift just for you. I know it isn’t enough to last you through tomorrow. I’ve measured it out, carefully counting and making sure that it will sustain you just long enough, just until the very second that I will give you the next ‘just enough.’ Come to Me for it. I will have it ready, prepared and waiting. You will always have enough because I AM enough and you have Me. Don’t forget that. But because I know you will, and because I won’t grow tired of teaching you again, here is your daily bread. I’ll have more for you tomorrow.
Yeah, you too?
There are have been seasons that stretched me and brought me low, down to the floor and on my knees. There have been seasons of abundance, too. I’m not living in a time of scarcity, so please don’t misinterpret, but also please hear me say that I can’t remember another time in my life where I’ve depended on Him daily to make ends meet.
And He keeps coming through.
The end of the month rolls around and I look at my budget, my bills, and my head starts to shake back and forth because it’s enough. It always shows up, always stretches just a little farther, multiplying and appearing and just in time.
There are people around who would sweep in and save the day, providing whatever I needed to make it until another paycheck. I know this. I am stubborn and not easily one to ask for help. I know this, too.
And God? He knows both of those things. He has placed people around to support and provide, He has wired me to be independent, and He takes both of those pieces of the puzzle, looks at how I just want so desperately to “do this thing” and “make it work” and look capable, strong, smart, whatever. He knows the end of my rope and He brings me right to it – often.
And then He gives me my daily bread.
He did it yesterday and last week and the month before that.
He’ll do it tomorrow, too. On October 6th I’ll be handed another loaf and then on the 11th and the 23rd. I’ll show up with open hands and He shows off.
That’s it. That’s really, truly it.
I show up. He shows off.
And in all of it, in every question and tear-filled look at my color-coded budget spreadsheet, in the times I say “no” because I need to cut back, in the times I buy that thing for that person and trust He’ll give more the next day, in the doubts and fears and “have I made a mistake here?” moments… in all of it…
I am finding that He is my daily bread. Always enough, sustaining and never lacking.