Here’s a piece of truth: Chapter 8 of my book was never — ever — in the plan. Zero percent of me wanted to write it. No part of me wanted to share that part of my story. But God was clear, the words are in print, and I am not even kidding you when I say I’ve gotten more private messages about this chapter than any others.
Next Tuesday will be our final week in this Tuesday series of looking at Even If Not: Living, Loving, and Learning in the in Between. Every post has included a short video, a free printable, and an excerpt from the book.
This week? This chapter? Names & Dreams?
It’s about trusting God with your dreams…
…and believing He is still good even if they never come true.
P.S. You can order the book for the the full story and, as always, catch up on all the chapter excerpts here.
Even If Not // chapter eight: names & dreams
I don’t want you to know this part of me.
One of my favorite quotes about writing is by Flannery O’Connor. She said, “I write because I don’t know what I think until I read what I say.” I’m pretty sure that in the process of writing this chapter, I am about to discover just what I think about names and dreams, hopes and longings and the truth that this ampersand season might last a whole lot longer than anticipated.
I never set out to write these words, to tell you about these dreams that sometimes hurt, but then again I never planned to write this book. But God tapped my shoulder in that way of His, the one where you know you have a choice as to whether or not you’ll obey, but you also know good and well that you wouldn’t dare to disobey. And so you’ll do it, whatever it is. Even if you’d honestly rather not, obeying is the most important thing because you love Him and trust His heart for you.
That is the mental space I was in as I began this book. Everything was going smoothly, the words coming naturally, until one morning as I made breakfast He tapped my shoulder one more time and spoke so clearly words I know to be His because I would never come up with them myself.
Tell that story. Share that space. You’ve gone deeper, go deeper still.
You’ve written with your heart, now write in the middle of the hurt. Practice not knowing the answers and be gut-level honest with the questions. I will be real, I will be present, and I will be more than enough. I can take it. But I need you to go there and put it down in ink, although that seems scariest of all, because there is someone else who needs these words. Will you do that for Me? Will you tell your story and give Me the glory?
With shaking hands and tears blurring the keyboard, I will. Every single word found in this book matters to me. Each one holds weight, every in between and ampersand season has had its own unique challenges and joys, hardships and victories. And yet they all, in one way or another, have closure.
Although I am still in the in between of each of these, if every chapter were a pendulum I would be swinging toward the right, into the healing and the light.
But not with this one.
Video & Free Print
“There is purpose right here, right now, today.”
This print is available for exactly zero cents. Just subscribe to the blog {click here or on the image below} to receive the print above + eight others!
