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A book for the broken hopefuls… Even If Not: Living, Loving, and Learning in the in Between

Even If Not: Living, Loving and Learning in the in Between

kaitlyn_bouch

📚Author of #EvenIfNotBook
✏️Writer: kaitlynbouchillon.com
☕️Lover of iced coffee
💻Virtual Assistant

✨ giveaway ✨ Four years ago today, this book r

✨ giveaway ✨ Four years ago today, this book released into the world. I said this last February 23rd & I stand by it: When I began writing Even If Not, I had no idea what it would cost me.⁣
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Fun fact: you’ll be asked/challenged to live out what you write. Even though you’ve already lived it.⁣⁣
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(Dear God, I’d like to write about great vacations next, thank You.)⁣⁣
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Honestly, I could write a book titled “Even If Not — Again” at this point, because God continues to provide new opportunities (invitations) to say it all over again: I know You could come through how I’m asking, but I’ll love & trust You even if You don’t.⁣⁣
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So today, four years later, this “book birthday” is for remembering & celebrating. For lunch with friends & reading a book & writing new words of my own. Today is, apparently, for crying during worship at church because heyyyyy chapters 3 & 4, God redeems it all.⁣⁣
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Today is for counting the cost & knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that I’d pay it again. I’ve walked storylines I never would have chosen for myself, many that are bound in this book & others that will never be printed in ink, but I believe it with everything in me: He is good on every single page.⁣⁣
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Happy birthday, #EvenIfNotBook. I’ve heard readers describe you as a life-changing read & I have to agree. You certainly changed mine.⁣⁣
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🎉 I’m giving away TWO copies, one for you and one for a friend. To enter:⁣⁣
💛 follow @kaitlyn_bouch⁣⁣
💛 tag a friend⁣⁣
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(Watch IG Stories for a bonus entry!)⁣⁣
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👉🏻 GIVEAWAY CLOSED. Congratulations to the randomly selected winner, @beclagg!⁣
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This giveaway is in no way affiliated with or sponsored by Instagram or Facebook.

There are broken hearts and beautiful things, hell

There are broken hearts and beautiful things, hellos and goodbyes, sunrises and sunsets and sunshowers. There is grief and there is joy, sometimes at the very same time, but God does not waste our hurt or our hope.⁣
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We can be sad and grateful. We can smile even with tears in our eyes. We can dare to say “This isn’t what I would have written,” even while trusting that He doesn’t make mistakes and He sees the entire storyline.⁣
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This has always been the truth, and it will not change:⁣
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You have not been forgotten or overlooked. You aren’t falling behind. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be today, and this chapter is not a mistake.⁣
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Here’s to the beautiful and ordinary of right now.⁣
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May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him today.⁣
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#beautifulordinarynow #miracleseverywhere

And also: the day you plant the seed is not the da

And also: the day you plant the seed is not the day the flower blooms.⁣
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Keep at it. Choose faithfulness. Take another step. Practice patience. Hold onto hope. Do the next right thing. Believe.⁣
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Don’t dig up in doubt what you planted in faith. - Elisabeth Elliot⁣
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#beautifulordinarynow #evenifnotbook #gloriousinthemundane

This right here is what redemption looks like. 😭👏🏻🌷⁣
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February 18th matters to me. Two years ago, a grocery store clerk made fun of me for “having” to buy my own (red) flowers. I can still feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, immediately flushing with embarrassment, confusion and surprise.⁣
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It stung. His cutting remark left a mark.⁣
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Fast forward a year and I shared a piece of the story at @incourage. It cost something to write those words, but I’d do it one thousand times over because at the end of the post, I dared women to go ahead and buy the flowers.⁣
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And they did. 👏🏻 Strangers tagged me in pictures of bouquets and I smiled wide every time.⁣
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The story has a Part 2, though. I took my own dare last February 18th—and something special happened.⁣
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Redemption rushed into an ordinary moment, and because God is hilarious and the actual best at timing, I was assigned the February 18th (in)courage blog post this year. (Me when I found out: 😂 & 😭)⁣
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I’ll share an excerpt below—the full post is linked in my bio (click “the latest blog post”). But just for the record? It wasn’t until I got home that I saw Part 3 staring back at me in this image:⁣
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Red tulips.⁣
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Without thinking, I reached for the red again. And He handed me redemption.⁣
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“On paper, my life looks much the same today as it did then. But another year has passed and He has remained faithful. The calendar pages have turned, but He has not turned away.⁣
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Two things can be true at the same time: This isn’t what I pictured. There are dreams that have died. But also? I’m 100% confident that the Dream Giver is the Author of my story, and He is good.⁣⁣
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This was always Plan A. And while there are things I wish I had that I don’t, I actually have so much more than I deserve.⁣⁣
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This right here, this life full of incredibly ordinary days and mundane moments, is surprisingly spectacular in one million small ways."⁣
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#beautifulordinarynow #buytheflowers #kaitlynsees2020

Today is a great day to reach out to your single f

Today is a great day to reach out to your single friends.⁣
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You don’t have to make it A Thing. Today might bring with it loneliness, sadness, fear, confusion, dread, grief or doubt. Today may be hopeful and joyful. Today might be just another day on the calendar.⁣
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You may not know how she feels about today, and you know what? She might not know either. Or she may not be able to put it into words.⁣
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But YOUR words? They will matter no matter what kind of day she’s having.⁣
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Reach out. Send a text, leave a voicemail, send a digital gift card her way. Make plans to meet for coffee, invite her over for dinner, write a handwritten letter (a unicorn of a gift in today’s world).⁣
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Single friend reading this? Stop scrolling for just a second and lean in, because it’s real important:⁣
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Today and every day, you are wanted. You are seen. You are valued. You are not alone or on your own. You are loved, you are loved, you are loved.

My jaw dropped when the “would you consider lead

My jaw dropped when the “would you consider leading Beth Moore’s launch team” email came through. Hold on let me pray about it — yes absolutely. I’ll remember that moment for a long time.⁣
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I was honored before I had read a single word of Chasing Vines.⁣
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And then I read it.⁣
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Every single word, some chapters more than once. I underlined and wrote notes in the margins. At one point I started talking back to the pages. (“What in the actual world. That is incredible.”)⁣
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My jaw dropped multiple times, but it wasn’t because of an email or an opportunity. No, it was an invitation — to come closer and see the Truth that is supremely wonderful and outrageously beautiful woven (like a vine, one might say) from Genesis to Revelation.⁣
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Like turning a gem ever so slightly, on the other side of this book I have a fuller, better view. The Story is the very same as it always has been, but I see a little more clearly.⁣
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The #ChasingVines launch team wraps up later this week. I wasn’t asked or paid by the publisher or Beth’s team to say a single word about the book on my social media — I simply want you to know about it. This is a book I’ll return to for years to come.⁣
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My original email response included this sentence, and I mean it wholeheartedly: “Beth’s writing, teaching, and leadership has greatly impacted me personally and it would be a joy to come alongside her and this message.” @bethmoorelpm, your faithfulness to the Vine has and will continue to leave a legacy of fruitfulness. Thank you.

Thank you for your messages in response to yesterd

Thank you for your messages in response to yesterday's post. 😭 You met vulnerability with grace, and together we get to push back the darkness just a bit, to say Light wins and He is greater.⁣
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If you'd like the link to my go-to playlist, the songs I sing into the night, comment or send a DM. 🙋🏻‍♀️ Happy to share! Below are lyrics—truths—to hold onto all day, any day, night terrors or not.⁣
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🎵It may look like I’m surrounded but I’m surrounded by You.⁣
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🎵The weapon may be formed but it won't prosper. When the darkness falls it won't prevail. 'Cause the God I serve knows only how to triumph. My God will never fail.⁣
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🎵Peace be still, You are here so it is well. Even when my eyes can’t see, I will trust the Voice that speaks.⁣
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🎵You were singing in the dark, whispering Your promise. Even when I could not hear, I was held in Your arms. Carried for a thousand miles to show not for a moment did You forsake me.⁣
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🎵Way maker, miracle worker, promise keeper, light in the darkness. My God, that is who You are.⁣
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🎵You have led me through the fire and in darkest night You are close like no other. All my life You have been faithful. All my life You have been so, so good. With every breath that I am able, I will sing of the goodness of God.⁣
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🎵We will find our rest when we rest in You⁣. Every promise made You have seen it through⁣. God with us, humble King, You will lead us to⁣ a peace that knows no end⁣.⁣
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♥️ These two words are so small compared to how your art, your music, your words have met me in the early morning hours. But—thank you—to each of these in the playlist: @karijobe @jjhellermusic @meremusic @audreyassad @aandlamusic @thebelongingco @iamjillphillips @hillsongworship @shadessongs @sarahkmc @calebandkelsey @katietorwalt @bryantorwalt @elevationworship @bethelmusic @mwsmithofficial⁣
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#myweaponisamelody #spiritualwarfare (lettering by @andreahoweyandco)

*deep breath* For many years now, I’ve battled n

*deep breath* For many years now, I’ve battled night terrors. (These differ from nightmares, trust me.) If you’ve read #evenifnotbook, this won’t be “new news.” ⁣
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“Try it tonight and I’ll call your bluff tomorrow,” I said after a recent night terror, promising myself I’d say something publicly next time. And now, here we are.⁣
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They show up unannounced every once in a while. Sometimes that means once every other month, sometimes three times in one month, sometimes multiple times a night.⁣
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I didn’t know what they were for a long time. Then, I didn’t know what to do. But now when they show up, I’m ready. I don’t welcome them in, but I sure as hell show them the door.⁣
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I wrote heck there ^ but I think hell actually belongs in that sentence.⁣
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I hate the darkness. I hate night terrors. I hate how they follow me through the day, flashing images in my head that I refuse to put words to. But I’ve discovered a secret and I want you to know it:⁣
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My weapon is a melody.⁣
Your weapon is a melody.⁣
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Always, I wake up in a panic, believing what I’ve just “lived” and “seen” is reality. After I catch my breath, I pray one word—out loud, because you best believe the darkness flees at the name of Jesus repeated over and over.⁣
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And then? I sing. Poorly, one lyric at a time, I sing into the night until dawn breaks or I fall asleep—whichever comes first.⁣
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If you’re in the dark today, I am so sorry. It’s a fight and I know what it costs to keep on showing up. But the battle? It has already been won. ⁣
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Not to spoil the ending, but Light wins.⁣
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Darkness might feel like it’s closing in, but heaven is breaking through. So we pray. We speak the name of Jesus. And then we sing, whispering the words if we have to. You aren’t alone. Our weapon is a melody.⁣
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(I’ll share some of my go-to worship songs tomorrow.) #outofdarknesslight #myweaponisamelody #spiritualwarfare

May we let go of what isn’t ours to carry even a

May we let go of what isn’t ours to carry even as we hold tight to grace and peace. May we remember what winter taught us while we wait with hopeful anticipation for all that spring will bring. There is good right here, in the muddy and messy in between. Night will end, dawn will break, seasons will change — but His love forever remains the same.⁣⁣ #beautifulordinarynow

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