Updated to add: We got the call. I’ll be headed to Miami (I don’t remember which hospital) and will meet with the surgeon Friday morning. They will probably run some tests Friday. Depending on what he thinks, I may be able to come home (or maybe even go on part of the vacation?) until Monday. It’s likely that I’ll have the surgery Tuesday. I’ll let you know once I know more details. Thank you all for your kindness, prayers, and support.
Okay. It’s, apparently, time for a little heart-to-heart. One that I wasn’t expecting to have. Ever.
There’s no easy way to say this, so let me just dive in. Remember that MRI I had last night? Well I was planning to tell you all about it today. I was going to tell you how freezing cold the room was, how nice the lady was, and how it all went well.
I was going to explain that we wouldn’t know the results until Thursday morning when I went to see the doctor. I was going to say, once again, that I was hoping for some answers. Hoping and praying for answers that would be fixable. Easily fixable.
I have answers. Not all the answers, but the MRI showed what’s been causing me to feel such horrible neck pain as well as why I’ve gotten so dizzy and thrown up so much.
I have a brain tumor.
My mom and I went to the doctor earlier this afternoon…He didn’t want to wait until tomorrow. We don’t know much about it, except that it must be operated on as soon as possible.
We’re waiting for the call to find out when we must go to the hospital, what hospital we’ll be going to, etc. We should be leaving tonight or early tomorrow. I will have surgery within the next few days.
They’ll have to shave at least part of my hair.
I love my hair. It sounds so ridiculous to be sad about THAT…but I am. I have senior year coming up and senior pictures. I’ve had them planned for a while now. And I plan to be HERE for my senior year.
I’ll probably miss camp. I’m SO bummed about that. My church has youth camp every year..and I’ve gone since 3rd grade. Junior and Senior year is always really special because of an activity that you get to do the last night. I’m praying that I can at least be well enough to attend the last night of camp.
Surprisingly, I haven’t cried that much. I cried watching my mom cry. It’s hitting her really hard. She couldn’t even tell my brothers so I told them instead. I think my dad is just trying to be strong.
I’m okay. I really am. I’m sad and bummed. I’ve cried and I’m curious as to what all this will mean. Like I said, we don’t know very much. I’m not “allowed” to tell anyone because mom doesn’t want to worry everyone when we don’t know very much. But I had to tell you all. I had to just get it out there.
I don’t know if I’ll be blogging again before we leave, because we could get the call at any moment. I most likely won’t be blogging throughout the process. But when I get back home (and it’ll probably be at least 1-2 weeks), I’ll update you all.
Because I plan to come back home.
I love Him and I know where I’ll go if He calls me home. But I’m not ready to go there yet. I have so much more life that I want to live.
Please please please know that I’m not that scared. He already knew this would happen. He knows how long the tumor has been there, and He knows if it’s cancer or not. Only HE can heal me.
I trust Him. No matter what happens, I trust Him completely.
Please join me in praying for the doctor who will be performing my surgery. Please pray for my parents and brothers; especiallly my mom. Pray that my brothers will still get to go on vacation next week (we were all looking forward to going, but obviously that is not still possible). Pray that my brothers will do GREAT in the state baseball tournament that they’ve made it to. I’m bummed I won’t get to see them play. Please pray for strength and lots of wisdom. Pray for my health. As silly as it sounds, please pray that I get to keep most of my hair and that I get to go to part of camp.
Please pray that I will have a happy, positive attitude. And that I’ll keep trusting my Healer through all of this. If I didn’t have Him, I don’t know how I’d be doing through all of this. It’s not what we were expecting to hear today, but we’re going to be aggresive and get this thing gone.
I don’t need a lot of, “I’m so sorry; how horrible!” comments. If you want to leave comments, please go right ahead. But I don’t need the attention. What I want from you all, more than anything, is your prayers. I want to be a light through all of this that JESUS is important. He’s my Healer and I trust Him regardless of what happens.
Mallory – Wow…I can’t imagine that.
Seriously guys…your comments and prayers meant (and still mean) SO much. It really encouraged me, and continues to do so. I don’t understand why you all compliment me for all this, but it sure is nice of you. So thank you all!
God is with you and so are all our prayers. You are an inspiration to many. May the Lord bless you through this more then you ever could have imagined.
Arizona Mamma, I’m not sure if you’ll see this response, but here’s the answer. :)
Since January I’ve gotten really sick 5-6 times. I’ve blogged about it some, if you’d like to go back and look. Basically, I would wake up and immediatly feel VERY dizzy. I could barely walk. I would go straight to the bathroom and would stay there the rest of the day throwing up. This happened 5-6 times, and for a while it was every 3 weeks. But we could never figure out why. I took a blood test, and everything looked normal. While this was going on, I would sometimes feel some neck pain. It was never too bad, and I’ve always gotten headaches, so I let it go. This past month my neck has REALLY started hurting. I would wake up in horrible pain, and for the rest of the day…whenever I moved my neck it would almost always hurt. Sometimes I could find a position where it would be a dull pain, but a lot of times it was just a sharp pain where my neck and head meet. Since it was hurting SO badly the past few weeks, my mom took me back to the doctor and this doctor ordered an MRI. Normally they don’t, but he thought it might be a tumor. He was right. Hope that answers your questions. :)
thank you thank you thank you!
If this is a duplicate comment, I apologize…I was having some trouble.
May I ask what symptoms you were having leading up to learning about the tumor, and how long you had them?
You are in my thoughts and prayers OneGirl. HE is great and he WILL help you out of this. Stay positive and leave everything to HIM. I am praying for all your requests. Amen…
Im not sure if my last comment went through as there was a glitch. I said a prayer for you and wanted to let you know that you make the 4th brain tumor case I have heard about this month. 2 are a husband and wife and she has had hers for a while and is doing ok. I hope this little bit of info helps you to stay strong. He will be there for you. He always has. Hugs….
Keeping you in my thoughts, OneGirl!
I met Courtney through Bloom (online Bible Study) and saw her blog asking for prayers on your behalf. It’s my honor to join you in prayer — for healing, for peace, for the doctors, and especially for your mom. I’m a mom of 2 little ones, and one of them getting sick is one of my biggest fears. Your attitude is one we all need to embrace. He is our Healer. He is our Protector. He has Ultimate Control. I believe He will use you through this – stay strong, stay positive, stay in Him.
Hey, delurking to say I’m praying for you. I pray that all goes as expected, quick and with an easy recovery. I pray that you’ll be enjoying all your senior year fun soon!!
You are so strong in your faith OneGirl.. Quite the inspiration! I am praying for every request you mentioned!!
God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle. And all the rest, he strengthens you! Stay brave!
I just found your blog through blogfrog today. Please know that you and your family are in my prayers! You have an amazingly amount of grace, acceptance, faith, and strength for a young woman of your age and these attributes will serve you (and allow you to serve) well. Much love!
A friend of mine posted a link here asking others to pray for you, and I just want to offer you my support. I’m 18 years old and last fall I had six brain surgeries in two months. It wasn’t because of a tumor, but I can completely relate to being sad about your hair and missing school and things. I missed my first semester of college because of it. Your strength radiates off the screen and I am praying for you.
Sending prayers your way. Stay strong honey!
Praying to the Great Physician and Healer! You have such faith and strength! Take heart – He hears you!
Hey I put together a blog button for OneGirl. I’m not sure how to post it here, but if anyone wants to grab it, it’s on the right sidebar of my blog.
Prayers for you, sweet friend. I’m honored to share your story, and your faith. I hope it spreads like wildfire to the rest of the world. God really does have big plans for you!
So sorry to hear this news. You sound very strong and brave. Trust in the Lord and we’ll be praying for you.
Thank you all so much!
Andrea, my email is liveitout516 (at) aol (dot) com
OneGirl, your faith is a true testament to all of us who are touched by you…crying and praying…crying not only because it is sad that you have to deal with this but crying too because you are such a beautiful example of being Christlike and being a christian…
I left this over on BF but I’d love your email and an address be it at the hospital or at home so I can send you some sort of package…because comeon, everyone LOVES a package!
I’m so glad you could tell us. Will definitely be saying some prayers for your surgery and speedy recovery.
Much love girl.
OK I am like Mulie here and I am crying as well because I have a son who is the same age as you…..I can completely understand where your mom is coming from and please be patient with her even if she frustrates you, it is a mother’s job to worry and fret.
I like Robin believe that your strength and faith will help you tremendously through this. Yes they are taking an aggressive road to help you with this but they have found the cause of the problem and they have faith that surgery will help out tremendously…..trust in your doctors.
Ok my planned quick comment turned into a novel. Know that you are loved and in the thoughts and prayers of many and we look forward to hearing from you and knowing that you will be HERE for a good long while to come without all this yuck you have had to deal with.
You’re faith can move the mountains! I’ve got hope in you girlie! Keep your eyes on Jesus, and God will take care of everything!!!!
Will you have an address once you’re recovering in the hospital? I would love to send you some get well soon goodies. Please let me know if I can.
I will be praying for you!!!!!
Oh my gosh. I don’t know what to say. That must have hit you like a bus. You’re in my thoughts, and I hope that everything turns out fine! Stay strong!
My prayers are with you and your family. Keep your head up and keep us posted if you need anything else!
I am praying so hard right now it isn’t even funny OneGirl. You WILL be OK and He WILL get you through this. You are amazing and strong and in my thoughts….
You are a strong and amazing girl. God will carry you through this. He is standing by you loving every single cell in you. I am praying!
I truly believe that your faith will keep you strong through this. You will absolutely be in my thoughts and I’ll be waiting for your amazing update because I know you will be fine! Huge Hugs!
I’ll be praying for you and your family. I hate that you have to go through this but I’m so glad you’ll come out stronger on the other side.
Ok, I’m crying! Please email me your personal information (name, address, email address, etc). firstname.lastname@example.org
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. You sound like such a strong young woman.
I will absolutely be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!