I just got home from school a little while ago. I walked in the door, ate some bread (strange new thing of mine-eating bread (with nothing on it) all by itself as a snack), told my mom about classes, and headed up here.
To the computer.
To the Internet.
Where I can think and process.
I like it in this room. I like it with the door open or the door shut. I just like being in front of the computer. It may sound strange, but I bet a few of you feel the same way.
The computer doesn’t judge me. It’s that simple. What I write and type out is judged by people that I may or may not know. But, regardless, the computer does not judge me. And I like that.
Something went down last night that is not a very big deal…but it was big enough that I got in bed to try to sleep…and all I could think about was what had happened. I hate those times, don’t you? When you know it’s not worth your time and you don’t want to dwell on the negative, but it won’t leave you alone.
To sum it up, I felt judged last night. I felt attacked. Not by the computer, but via the computer. Through someone who chose to remain anonymous.*
*Please don’t be mislead, this was not through a comment left on my blog. Thankfully, you all have been so wonderful and nice here! I appreciate it more than you know :)
I hate that. If someone wants to be rude, then be rude. But say it to my face, or at least let me know who you are. *sigh*
Anyways, I was lying (laying?) there trying to sleep and it just wasn’t happening. My body was not going to sleep. So I told Jesus that I felt attacked. That I felt I was being judged for something that was just plain ridiculous.
And then I started thinking about how He was judged and how He was attacked.
Obviously, His situation was much worse.
I still don’t like being judged. Especially when I’m judged unfairly. Especially when they don’t know me well. Especially when they choose to remain ‘anonymous’ attackers. Especially when they have no business judging what they don’t understand.
So, for today, I will remain close friends with my computer.