“Well, there’s nothing interesting here.”
Yeah, I’ve never been happier to be boring.
The results came back, the scans are clean, and for the first time in five years I get a bit of a break before going back for more tests. You can tell me all the day long that my brain holds nothing interesting if that means I’m tumor-free and know just as well as the next person how many days I’ve got left on this spinning planet.
As in, none of us really know. And I’m really, really okay with that today.
There’s a book that I’ve been wanting to read for months. Well, that’s partly true. If we’re being totally honest, I’ve been a bit nervous to click ‘order’ and then open the pages upon its arrival. Because if you’re Learning to Walk in the Dark then, well, there’s darkness around you. That seems obvious, but wouldn’t you rather not need to learn how?
And it’s not so much that I’m scared of the dark, but that I’m worried about what might be in the dark. I don’t fear the night, but the quiet, the silence, and what could interrupt it. Sometimes it carries over into other parts of life too.
Cancer. Bills. Divorce. Broken relationships. Depression. Unemployment.
And yeah, spiritual warfare.
This past year has seen a good bit of darkness and a whole lot of light. Skim a few earlier chapters and you’ll see the dark side of sickness and the emptiness of loneliness. Take a trip to Haiti and listen to a man tell his story of practicing voodoo, hear his voice break as his heart breaks at the words leaving his lips.
And then watch God light up the sky. It’s never too dark for Light to break through.
Even when light fades and darkness falls — as it does every single day, in every single life — God does not turn the world over to some other deity. Even when you cannot see where you are going and no one answers when you call, this is not sufficient proof that you are alone. -Barbara Brown Taylor, Learning to Walk in the Dark
Sometimes we just need a permanent reminder that always, always, no matter what — out of darkness, light.
It comes streaming in. Just a pinprick at first, a small glimmer of hope, one minute that you forget the sadness, a day or two of breathing easier. A doctor telling you “there’s nothing interesting here.”
Even when you cannot see a way, cannot catch a breath, cannot stop the hurry and rush and panic inside. Even then. Hold fast because Light is here and Light is coming and your sky is going to blow up golden and bright. And then the sun will set again and night will come as it does every single day. But that is how it goes and we don’t know how many more rounds we’ll go. Sunrise, sunset. Sunrise, sunset.
I think that’s the beauty of it. Would we know the Light if we had never experienced the dark?
Affiliates links used in this post.
Beautiful post. So thankful that things are looking clear!
Thank you for linking up with Grace & Truth this week. <3
Thank *you* for hosting!
Your words of encouragement have blessed so many! I’m so happy your scans were clear! Praise God! Thanks for sharing with us at Waiting on…Wednesday! I hope you’ll join us again tomorrow!
Holly @ http://www.iwillservewhileiwait.blogspot.com
So happy for you with your test results and I appreciate you sharing this with us at Good Morning Mondays so we can all rejoice with you. Blessings
Praising the Lord, Kaitlyn, for the good news, not only in your test results but by the Light that shines through you from God to us. You are beautiful.
Caring through Christ, ~ linda
such beautiful words.. thank you.
Such beautiful writing. To God be the glory for clear scans.
Glad to hear you have good news!
Love this line: It’s never too dark for Light to break through.
This is true. The Light always overcomes the darkness.
Love this. Love this. Love this. And love that your scans came back “uninteresting!” This is my first time visiting (#WomenWithIntention), and I am SO glad I found you! You have a beautiful way with words, and I look forward to reading more. Blessings!
Boring has never seemed better. ;) So glad you stopped by, Wendy!
“Would we know the Light if we had never experienced the dark?”
That grabs me right down in my soul. The Lord is big enough and faithful enough that even the darkness cannot hide Him, nor is it wasted on Him… He will use it to gather us close.
Close enough to hear His heart beat.
Beautiful post, Kaitlyn. Hugs and blessings for another week!
So beautiful. Thanks for sharing on Literacy Musing Mondays.
Excellent post. Did you see the movie The Croods? Oh, they were so afraid of the light that they remained in the dark until one day…well, don’t want to spoil it if you haven’t seen the movie! I am #46 at WWI, glad I visited.
Hmm I haven’t heard of that movie… is it a recent one?
I’m your neighbor at a couple of linkups today! I’m so glad, too. First of all, congratulations on your clear body scans! That is such very good news! And thank you for your most encouraging words about walking through the darkness. The past few months have been very difficult for my family, and I have been battling a cloud of discouragement and anxiety. Thank you for reminding me that we have THE LIGHT, and even the darkest valleys can be walked one step at a time as He holds our hand.
It’s so great to “meet” you Sharon! I hope that these words were an encouragement to you today, no matter what you’ll face tomorrow.
WIsdom right here. Bless you.
Beautiful words and beautiful test results. So glad for you.
Beautiful and honest. thank you! I loved this (Even when you cannot see a way, cannot catch a breath, cannot stop the hurry and rush and panic inside. Even then. Hold fast because Light is here and Light is coming and your sky is going to blow up golden and bright.) Stopping by from Reflect
“wouldn’t you rather not need to learn how?” Yes! Until I consider the glorious light that has emerged from past darkness. Then I know this dark will be worth it too. Thank you for your hopeful words, Kaitlyn!
Beautiful – clear scans!!!! And then watch God light up the sky. It’s never too dark for Light to break through. AMEN!
Please share your words at DanceWithJesus Linkup each Friday – bless others with your healing words, Kaitlyn… SusanBMead.com/blog
Thanks for inviting me to your link up. I’ll totally take you up on that offer.
Congrats…I’m so happy for you and I cannot even imagine how relieved you must be…Love the quote because I’ve experienced the truth of it more times than I can count..so glad darkness is as light to God (Psalm 139: 11-12)…sent you an e-mail :-)
YES. The dark is not even dark to Him. (Emailed you back. :))
Awe, so glad to hear of your positive news. I think that this is my first time visiting you here. I have a large cyst on my brain, so I kind of ‘get’ that “darkness.” Due to a nurse’s error with reading the chart, I went a few months thinking that it was a tumor, not just a cyst. So glad we have a God whose eyes are not subject to the darkness…who *is* the light…holding our hands, leading us where we can’t yet see.
Thank you for sharing this lovely post. Happy to be visiting you today from the Titus 2 Tuesday linkup.
Brenda it’s great to “meet” you – thanks for visiting. And I am so glad to hear that it is not a tumor!!
How wonderful that your results came back clear. Praise His glorious name! He is so good to us! I love your words, they are so full of hope and promise. I love your final question, “Would we know the Light if we had never experienced the dark?” How true. His light shines brightest in the darkness, and it is often in the midst of difficulties that we learn best of His love and comfort.
Agreeing with you over here.
Thank God for nothing interesting! Your words of hope in the darkness are beautiful and encouraging. Especially these: “It comes streaming in. Just a pinprick at first, a small glimmer of hope, one minute that you forget the sadness, a day or two of breathing easier. A doctor telling you “there’s nothing interesting here.” Thanks for sharing your story. Praising God with you!
Yes! Totally the best news.
Congrats on cancer free! I read Learning to Walk in the Dark this past spring and loved it.
I’d love to hear more of what you thought! Have you written anything on it?
I’m so happy for your good news, Kaitlyn! And thanks so much for this beautiful post. We always have a glimmer of light, no matter how small. And always the hope that it will grow brighter. “The Light shines in the darkness, yet the darkness has not overcome it.” John 1:5
Yessss I love that verse! A favorite, for sure.
I am so glad the scans are clear!!!!!!!!!!
There’s a saying…”it is better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness”.
The mercenary’s re-write is “illuminate, and fire for effect”…in other words, light up the enemy with flares, and then light him up with lead.
Works for me…and I even though the darkness is all around me now (the terminal diagnosis does that) I don’t fear it, because as a combat operator, my personal motto was “fear the darkness…for I am in it”.
Whatever works, I guess.
But I’m so glad for your good news!
Thank you, I’m really glad too! And I used that quote/saying in the post.